Why I Keep Avoiding the Truth About Mentors, Peers and Support

At the advanced stage, the avoidance of the full truth about your support situation is sophisticated. It doesn’t look like avoidance — it looks like realistic appraisal, discernment, patience, or wisdom about the limitations of the available options.

The advanced practitioner who is avoiding the truth about their support isn’t doing it obviously. They’re doing it through mechanisms that are woven into their genuine capabilities.

What Advanced Avoidance Looks Like

Analysis that concludes limitation. The sophisticated review of available support options that consistently concludes that nothing is quite right enough — that the available mentors aren’t at the right level, the available communities aren’t quite the fit, the available peers don’t have the specific combination of qualities that would make genuine peer support possible. This analysis may be accurate and is also serving an avoidance function.

Standards that exclude options. The genuinely elevated standards for what support needs to be — standards that are real, that reflect real development, and that also happen to ensure that nothing currently available qualifies. Elevated standards and avoidance are not mutually exclusive.

Waiting for conditions to be right. The conviction that the right support will become available when X happens — when your business reaches a certain level, when you’re in a different life phase, when you’ve done more inner work. The waiting that never quite completes because completion would require engaging with what’s available now.

Advanced avoidance through legitimate mechanisms is the sophisticated version of the same protection that simpler avoidance provides.

The Truth Underneath the Sophistication

The truth that advanced avoidance tends to protect is often something simpler and more vulnerable than the sophisticated analysis suggests: the acknowledgment that you are lonelier in the domain of support than your developed exterior suggests, and that this loneliness matters.

The simple truth underneath sophisticated avoidance — the ache for support that is more than what’s currently available — is harder to acknowledge when it coexists with significant development, capability, and apparent self-sufficiency.

The Action Underneath the Truth

The reason the truth stays avoided at the advanced stage is often the action it would require. If you acknowledge that the support isn’t adequate, you’d need to do something: lower the standards to engage with what’s available, invest significantly in searching for better options, or allow the genuine loneliness to be felt without immediately resolving it.

The action the truth requires is what the avoidance is actually protecting against — not the truth itself, but what would need to change if the truth were fully known.

You are not behind. The advanced practitioner who is still in sophisticated avoidance of the full truth about their support isn’t failing — they’re at the specific frontier where the most refined layer of the work lives.

If you’re ready to take the action that the truth requires and engage with a community that might be a genuine fit, the Abundance GPS Skool community offers a free trial. Join here.