A Step-by-Step Practice for Inner Child and Wounds

You’ve done the inner work. You know enough about childhood wounds to trace most of your patterns back to early experiences. You understand the language.

What you might be missing is a concrete practice — something specific you can do, step by step, when a wound activates in your business or your life.

This is that.

Go slowly. If anything here brings up a strong response, pause and breathe. Come back when you’re ready. This isn’t a practice to rush through.

Why Knowing Isn’t Enough

There’s a gap that frustrates almost everyone who does serious inner work. You understand the wound. You can articulate its origin, trace its pattern, explain its mechanism. And it keeps running.

Understanding lives in the cortex. Wounds live in the body, in the nervous system, in the automatic responses that fire before your thinking brain has a chance to intervene.

A step-by-step practice bridges that gap. It gives you something concrete to do when the wound activates — something that goes below the level of understanding and into the level of contact.

The Cue-Type-Matching Approach to Wounds

Cue-type matching is the idea that the healing intervention needs to match the type of wound — specifically, what kind of cue originally created the wound.

Some wounds formed from what was said. Others formed from what was not said, not done, not given. Others formed from body-level experiences — from feeling unsafe in the body rather than from specific words or events.

This matters because the practice that works best for a word-formed wound is different from the practice that works best for a silence-formed wound or a body-formed wound.

The step-by-step practice below includes all three types. Notice which one feels most relevant for the wound you’re working with.

The Practice: Step-by-Step

Before you begin: Ground yourself. Feet on the floor. A few slow breaths. Notice where you are in the room. This is about creating enough safety to go toward the wound without being overwhelmed by it.

Step 1: Identify the activating pattern.

What pattern in your business keeps recurring? Not the emotion — the behaviour. “I consistently don’t send proposals until it’s too late.” “I always lower my price without being asked.” “I create content and then pull back right before it goes out.”

Name the behaviour specifically.

Step 2: Find the wound beneath the pattern.

Ask yourself: what am I trying to protect by doing this? What am I afraid would happen if I didn’t?

Let the answer come from the body, not the thinking mind. Notice a tightness in the chest, a feeling in the stomach, a holding of breath. That sensation is pointing somewhere.

Step 3: Follow the sensation to an age.

Without forcing it, notice if the sensation in your body has a colour, a texture, or most importantly — an age. If this feeling were a younger version of you, how old would they be? Often a number or a scene surfaces naturally.

Step 4: Meet the child, not the problem.

Now, instead of focusing on the business pattern, focus on the child-age version of you who first experienced what created it. Not to analyse them. To be present with them.

Imagine them in the setting where they first formed this belief. What were they dealing with? What did they need that they didn’t have?

Don’t rush to comfort or fix. Just witness. Stay with them in what it was actually like.

Step 5: Offer what was missing (matching the wound type).

If the wound formed from harmful words: offer words that counter them. Speak directly. “That wasn’t true about you. You were not too much. You were not a burden. You were not undeserving.”

If the wound formed from silence or absence: offer presence. “I see you. I’m here. You don’t have to do this alone.”

If the wound formed from body-level experiences of unsafety: bring it to the body. Place a hand on your chest or your stomach. Breathe slowly. Let the body know: you are safe here, now.

Step 6: Notice what shifts.

After offering what was missing, sit for a moment. Notice whether there’s a slight softening anywhere. A breath that comes a little easier. A loosening somewhere in the body.

The shift may be subtle. Subtle is enough. You’re not looking for a dramatic moment. You’re looking for a degree of contact — for the wound to be met rather than managed.

Step 7: Return to the business pattern with the updated information.

Now bring the pattern back to mind. The proposal you’ve been avoiding. The price you keep lowering. The content you keep withholding.

Notice whether there’s a tiny difference in how it feels now. Often there is. Often the resistance is slightly less dense.

Then, from that tiny opening — take one action. Send the proposal. Keep the price where it is. Let the content go out.

That action is part of the healing.

How Often to Practice

This isn’t a once-and-done process. Different wounds reveal themselves at different times. Different layers of the same wound become accessible as you grow.

Weekly is a good rhythm when you’re actively working through a specific pattern. As needed is fine for maintenance.

The key isn’t frequency. The key is quality of contact — whether you’re actually going toward the wound, or once again understanding it from a safe analytical distance.

If you want support for this kind of practice from a community of conscious entrepreneurs doing the same work, explore the Abundance GPS community on Skool. Free trial available. Come at whatever stage you’re at.